Be the heroine of your life

>> Sunday, January 20, 2013

You could say that was the best advice I have read in 2012. It was after all, by scriptwriter, feminist and overall fabulous author Nora Ephron, who passed away last year.


It didn't strike me as the best possible piece of advice I could quote until one night, I was reeling from an exhausting day and night of satisfying work that I couldn't rack my brain for proper advice, whilst sipping a glass of red. I decided to flip my mental notebook to become a better friend and blurted this out. My friend {hello, you know who you are :)} exclaimed, "That's so nice! Can I tweet it?"

"Sure. Don't quote me though. We can thank Nora Ephron for this," I said.

And surely, when I think of all the things I've been doing since I came across this quote after my mother sent over two books by Miss Ephron, after I asked my mom to buy me some after Nora's death, they were pretty beneficial to who I have been. When I look back and think thoroughly, I found it easy to launch into a self-defeating campaign and self-deprecating demeanor --- after all, it is easier to dig oneself's grave rather than say no to someone, yeah?



It could be when you let yourself be taken over and washed away by things that make you sad (*guilty*), when you forego saying no because saying yes is easier. This much I know. It could be when you let your circumstances in life dictate your fate, when you resign yourself to a fact without a fight. This is when you choose to stay with things that make you miserable despite the misery because you are immensely afraid of getting out of your comfort zone. I should know. I was. If I had one life to live, why would I live like this? 



When I realized this, I further thought that I need not wait for the rest of my life {a phrase fans of When Harry Met Sally are intensely aware of} until I could execute the changes I wanted to take over my life. It wasn't an arduous process anymore but it was a mindset that came much later than I would've wanted. Many, many times, we like being drama queens and we would rather be victims of our lives than the hero. We'd like to believe that the situations are wrong because of the various people who make it wrong.



So as a way of giving back to the universe what it helped me learn, my dearest readers, here are some things on my mind: Take the reins to your own life, if especially, you are beyond 25. Take note and be mindful of your actions because one day you will question your history and it is most comforting, above all, that all you have to give credit to {or blame} is yourself. When you look back at all the choices you've made, the best feeling is knowing it was your doing. When you evaluate your future options, always weigh if it's in your best interest. Do not be afraid to say no to something that doesn't work for your benefit. This is not being selfish --- this is taking care of yourself. This is ensuring you can live through the choices you've made. This is being yourself's best friend because, take it from a 27 year old who's been on the other side way too many times --- yourself is all you've got 24/7.



And this is what I know for sure. What do you?

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