How to Be a Lady

There was an interesting discourse that had been happening within earshot and I couldn't help but ponder on the topic. The women in the group were complaining that the world is missing gentlemen --- and that men nowadays almost always forget to open doors, carry heavy stuff for women, forego green jokes in the presence of women, etc. Most of the guys were quiet until one spoke up:

"Well, most women have forgotten how to be a lady, too."

Audrey Hepburn is easily one of the classiest women in my book.

I wish I had the chance to sit down with them and hear what the girls and guys had to say but I was off to somewhere else and had to think about the ideal characteristics a lady should possess. Now, the goal wasn't to be preachy, as I am not exactly a poster girl for being ladylike. But my grandma and mom were, so I'm recalling all the lessons I got from them and will share those below, for reference :P

  1. A lady lets the man do the chasing. I am surely to get some flak for this, after all, it is the 21st century. Maybe, it's fine to do the first move, maybe it isn't. But I can only tell you my experience, and I can only speak for myself. Let me quote my pastor: "When you chase a man for the first time, you will chase him forever." By nature, men are hunters and when they've lost the drive to chase a woman, that is where the taking for granted part begins.
  2. A lady leaves something to the imagination. We all went through this phase, and I was no exception. It's always so fun to be wearing less clothing, especially when it's summer. Know the difference between comfort and exhibitionary. And no, it's never acceptable to show any part of your bra. Or sideboob.
  3. A lady keeps her home clean. Always. My mother once asked me for a photo of my bathroom when I just moved in. I didn't realize what it was for until she replied how the three bottom tiles were more yellow than the others. I shuddered in disbelief {that I missed these tiles!} and that my mother could tell despite the crappy quality of iPad 2's camera. I don't think there's ever a time it's acceptable for a woman to have a dirty home.
  4. A lady never swears. I should write this on a post it and stick it everywhere I go.
  5. A lady never kisses and tells.
  6. A lady never gets drunk to the point of passing out. O.o
  7. A lady doesn't over-bling. There's no point, in my book, why we should wear all our jewelries in one go. The same way, a lady never wears too much makeup.
  8. A lady doesn't put another lady down. In local parlance, real ladies do not engage in chismis. While it's a habit that's very easy to get into, it can be quite self-destructive after quite a time.
  9. A lady isn't noisy. She does speak up, yes. But she's never boisterous and she doesn't disrupt quiet or peaceful gatherings.
  10. A lady sends thank you notes, says "Please" and "Thank you." She also knows how to RSVP.
  11. A lady doesn't have to dignify everything with a response.
  12. A lady does not flaunt her money. She doesn't wear designer labels from head to toe. 
  13. A lady loves God. Because to me, a sign of being a lady is knowing and submitting to a higher power. This is God, her father, and her husband.


I am not all of these things I mentioned above but I do hope to be, and more. These are only what I know from my mother and grandma and the women I've met. If you know of any others, do leave them on the comments' section.

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