Tara's Guide to Attending a Wedding

AH. WEDDINGS.

I was telling a very young colleague lately how one must sort of plan out attending weddings. I can't say this enough: people get married left and right beginning in late twenties and to mid thirties, I think. Attending weddings is such a monumental moment: we witness our childhood friends, barkada, officemates, family promise forever to someone. I am of the belief that this is something worthy of a celebration.

My first wedding of the year is of my office friend's, Nica and his now-husband, Mathew. I am extremely glad to have been one of the people who've witnessed this important union in their lives and to have heard their vows {always my favorite part}. It's also always an excuse to wear formal wear, too.

Now, as a reminder to myself as well, here are some guidelines to attending a wedding, at least in the Philippines :P

Give what the couple wants. Rustan's bridal registry is the best and I'm so glad that my couple friends chose this for their gifts. I think money is also a popular choice nowadays and I think this is fair, given that you're sure that the marrying couple will like it so.
RSVP Matters. RSVP was invented for a reason and that is to give the couple an accurate idea of who among their invited guests will be there for sure. According to Vogue, under no circumstances is it okay to ask for a plus one. Wait for the bride or the groom to give you a plus one --- that's essentially asking them to pay for another person. And in these days of expensive per heads in the multi-billion wedding industry, that's not particularly easy to cop out. Marrying couples often have the A List, the B List and the C List. It may not always include a plus one for you.
Put your best foot forward. And don't outshine the bride. I've read about some horror stories about people who've attended weddings and got waaaaaay sloshed. Or proposed to their girlfriends, effectively stealing the bride's thunder. Or made inappropriate toasts. Or lewd comments to the bride. Or hit on the bride. Always best to err on the side of caution whenever in doubt.
Contribute to giving the guests a good time. I've seen it happen all the time in Filipino weddings: the couple would always ask everybody to stay for the after party but guests, often would scramble to get out of the wedding party as soon as they can. While I don't necessarily see weddings as an excuse to party, most couples crave for partying time with their guests after the formal programme. If you can spare the time, do stay, meet the other guests, share stories. If you're single, it's actually a legit way of meeting other single people. Whatever happens, have fun!